Rush (Breathless #1)

Rush (Breathless #1) Page 23

She sighed. “I just wondered. I mean, about the ‘other men’ thing. Is that a for-sure thing or is that a just-in-case thing?”

The very last thing he wanted to talk about—or imagine—when he was balls deep inside her and she was naked and sated in his arms, was another man touching her.

But there was also curiosity in her gaze. Not fear. Just genuine question. Almost as if she were wondering about it…

“How do you feel about that?” he asked bluntly. “Does it turn you on? The idea of another man touching you while I watch?”

She started to move her gaze from his.

“Eyes,” he commanded. “You look at me while we’re having this conversation.”

Her gaze flickered back and he could see the flush on her face.

Then she licked her lips and he could feel her nervousness, her hesitation.

“Okay, yes, I admit, I do wonder about it. I mean I can’t tell you if it’s something I’d like or not, but I do think about it. I know that Jace and Ash…”

Gabe winced. “I don’t really want to hear about Jace and Ash nor do I want to discuss anything that remotely involves them being naked.”

Mia laughed, her eyes sparkling. But she also relaxed in his arms as some of her tension fled.

“I just mean that I know they have threesomes with women and I guess I wondered about that. Not about them. God, no.” She shuddered. “But about the concept in general. I mean when I first read that in the contract, my immediate reaction was shock and a resounding hell no. But then I began to wonder what it would feel like.”

She trailed off in a whisper, her expression anxious as she stared up at him.

“Does that make you angry?”

He sighed. “I’m not going to get pissed at you for wondering about something I said was a possibility, Mia. There’s nothing wrong with your being curious. And I’m glad you’re not afraid. Does it excite you? Having someone else touch you while I’m watching and commanding the scene?”

Slowly she nodded. Her nipples hardened and her pussy clenched around his dick, sending a wave of pleasure through his groin. Yeah, the idea obviously excited her. He just wasn’t sure it was something he could ever give her. He wasn’t sure if he could stand by and watch another man touch what was his.

He leaned down to kiss her, not voicing any further thoughts on the matter.

He was really beginning to hate that fucking contract.

Chapter eighteen

Gabe’s line buzzed, and he frowned at the interruption. Mia was across the room at her desk—a distraction in itself—but he was putting together financials for a proposed island resort, and he’d specifically told Eleanor he wasn’t to be disturbed.

“What,” he barked into the intercom.

Eleanor’s nervous voice wavered over the line. “I know you said you weren’t to be disturbed, Mr. Hamilton, but your father is here to see you. He says it’s important. I didn’t think it wise to send him away.”

Gabe’s brow crinkled and his frown deepened. Across the room, Mia looked up from her work, worry in her eyes.

“I’ll come out,” Gabe said after a moment’s hesitation. He didn’t want whatever was on his father’s mind to be aired in front of Mia.

“I can leave, Gabe,” Mia said softly as he rose.

He shook his head. He much preferred her here in his office. Away from the gossip and speculation of others. He’d already uncovered the person responsible for breaking into his office—it hadn’t taken much encouraging on his part to get her coworkers to out her—and he’d terminated her on the spot without a reference. He wanted Mia as far away from that kind of environment as possible.

He strode out to the reception area to see his father standing a short distance from Eleanor’s desk. His father looked thoughtful and ill at ease. Gabe had never seen him look so uncomfortable. Especially around Gabe.

“Dad,” Gabe said in greeting. “What can I do for you?”

His father’s expression grew even more somber. There was a hint of regret that shadowed his eyes.

“There used to be a time when I’d come to see you and you didn’t ask me such a thing. You were glad to see me.”

Guilt dampened some of the irritability that plagued Gabe.

“You usually call. I wasn’t expecting you. I was concerned that something was wrong,” Gabe said.

His father hesitated a moment, then shoved his hands into the pockets of his expensive slacks. “There is. Can we go somewhere and talk? Have you had lunch yet? I was hoping you’d have time for me.”

“I always have time for you,” Gabe said softly, echoing a sentiment he’d offered his mother. Used to be he could spend time with them both and not have to split it between them.

Relief dimmed some of the worry in his father’s eyes.

“Let me call for my car,” Gabe said.

He turned to Eleanor. “Have the car pick us up outside. And make sure Mia eats lunch. Let her know I’m not sure when I’ll return and that if I’m not back by four to go ahead and leave for the day.”

“Yes, sir,” Eleanor said.

“Shall we go?” Gabe asked his father. “The car should be around by the time we get out front.”

The two rode the elevator down in silence. It was awkward and stilted but Gabe made no move to right it. He wasn’t sure what it would take to mend the breach between them. He’d acted like a bastard at the cocktail party. His father was probably embarrassed by the quick defection of his date. That hadn’t been Gabe’s intention. No matter his anger or confusion when it came to his father, he loved him and he had no intention of hurting him. He only wanted his father to see the kind of woman he’d chosen to associate with.

They waited a brief moment before Gabe’s car pulled up and the two men got in. Gabe directed the driver to Le Bernardin—one of his dad’s favorite places to eat.

It wasn’t until the two were seated and their orders placed that Gabe’s father broke the silence. It was as if he couldn’t remain silent a moment longer and the words came bursting out, his face a mask of sadness and regret.

“I’ve made a terrible mistake,” his father admitted.

Gabe went still. He put the napkin he’d been unfolding just to have something to do down on the table. “I’m listening.”

His father scrubbed a hand over his face and it was then that Gabe could see just how weary he looked. He seemed older. Aged overnight. There were shadows in his eyes, and the wrinkles at his eyes and brow were more pronounced.

His father fidgeted a moment and then took a deep breath, his entire face crumpling. To Gabe’s horror, tears shone in his dad’s eyes.

“I was a fool for leaving your mother. It’s the worst mistake of my life. I don’t know what I was thinking. I just felt so trapped and unhappy and I reacted to that. I thought if I did this or I did that or if I started over that it would fix everything—that I’d be happier.”

Gabe blew out his breath. “Shit,” he murmured. This was the last thing he’d expected to hear.

“And it wasn’t your mother’s fault. She’s a damn saint for putting up with me all these years. I think I woke up one day and thought to myself that I’m old. I don’t have much time left. I panicked and then I freaked out because I started blaming your mother. God. Your mother! The one woman who’s stuck by me all this time, who gave me a wonderful son. And I blamed her because I saw an old man staring back at me in the mirror. A man who thought he had to turn back the clock and get back all those years. I wanted to feel young again. Instead I feel like a bastard who shit on his wife—his family—you, Son. I shit on you and your mother and I can’t tell you how much I regret that.”

Gabe didn’t even know what to say. He was agog at all his father had just thrown at him. All of this because of some fucking late-in-life crisis? Coming to grips with inevitable age? Jesus.

“I hate to even come to you with this, but I don’t know what else to do. I doubt Matrice would even give me the time of day now. I hurt her. I know that. I don’t expect her to forgive me. If the positions were reversed and she did to me what I did to her, I doubt I could ever forgive her.”

“Goddamn, Dad. When you fuck up, you go big.”

His father fell silent, his gaze fixed on his drink, sadness rimming his eyes.

“I just want to go back—take it back—so it never happened. Your mother is a good woman. I love her. I never stopped loving her.”

“Then why the hell have you been doing your damnedest to shove all these other women not only in her face but mine?” Gabe snarled. “Do you have any idea how badly you hurt her?”

The older Hamilton’s face went even grayer. “I have an idea. Those women didn’t mean anything to me.”

Gabe held up his hand in disgust. “Stop it. Just stop it, Dad. God. You’re spouting the oldest cliché in the book. You think Mom gives a flying fuck if those women meant shit to you? Do you think it’ll make her feel better at night knowing that while you were out fucking some chick half your age—or younger—that you were really thinking about how much you loved her?”

His dad flushed and quickly looked around as Gabe’s voice rose. “I didn’t sleep with those women,” he said in a low voice. “Not that Matrice will ever believe me. But I’m telling you that I didn’t betray my marriage vows.”

Gabe’s temper simmered and he fought to keep it from erupting. “Yeah, Dad, you did. Whether you slept with them or not, you betrayed Mom and your marriage vows. Just because it wasn’t physical adultery doesn’t mean it wasn’t emotional adultery. And sometimes emotional adultery is the hardest to get over.”

His father rubbed a tired hand over his face and resignation bled into his features. “So you think I don’t have a chance of ever winning her back.”

Gabe sighed. “That’s not what I said. But you need to understand what you did to her before you can ever think to make it right. She has her pride too, Dad. And you damaged it. If reconciliation is what you really want, then you have to be in it for the long haul. She’s not going to take you back overnight. You can’t quit after one try. If she means anything at all to you, then you have to be willing to fight for her.”

His dad nodded. “Yeah, I get it. And I do want her. I never didn’t want her. It’s all so stupid. I’m a fool. An old, deluded fool who messed up.”

Gabe softened. “Talk to her, Dad. Tell her everything you told me. And you have to be patient and listen to her when she goes off on you. You have to listen while she calls you every name in the book. You deserve it. You have to give that to her and you have to take it.”

“Thanks, Son. I love you, you know. I hate that I hurt not only Matrice, but you as well. You’re my son and I let you both down.”

“Just make it right,” Gabe said softly. “Make Mom happy again, and that will be enough for me.”

• • •

“Hey Gabe, need to talk to you about…”

Mia looked up to see Jace standing in the doorway of Gabe’s office. Her heart leapt and her adrenaline spiked. He wasn’t supposed to be here yet. This wasn’t how she intended to break the news to him that she was working for Gabe.

Ash pushed in behind him and his eyebrows rose when he saw Mia sitting at her desk.

Jace’s face darkened and he looked between her desk and Gabe’s as if expecting it all to make sense.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Jace asked.

“Nice to see you too,” Mia said dryly.

Jace strode across the floor toward her desk. “Damn it, Mia. You caught me off guard. I wasn’t expecting to see you here.” He perched on the edge of her desk, his gaze scrutinizing as he took in the papers scattered over the surface and the laptop she was working on.

Ash sauntered in behind Jace, standing a short distance away, but no less interested.

“What are you doing here? Where the hell is Gabe?”

The confusion was evident in his voice. Mia took in a deep breath and plunged ahead, knowing the best thing to do was get it out of the way and in the open so nothing seemed suspicious. The longer she drew it out, the guiltier she’d look anyway. She had no poker face whatsoever—a fact that had kept her in trouble in her early teenage years. She’d never been able to lie to Jace with a straight face so she prayed his questioning didn’t get too in depth here or she was fucked.

“I’m working for him,” she said calmly.

Ash’s lips formed a silent O and then he turned back toward the door. “I’ll just wait outside.”

Jace’s face was the poster child for what the fuck. As soon as the door closed behind Ash, he turned back to Mia, his jaw tight. “Okay, what the hell is going on? You’re working for him? In what capacity? And why am I only just finding this out?”