Reckless (Thoughtless #3)

Reckless (Thoughtless #3) Page 6

I was parched when I woke up. Parched and confused. I couldn't remember leaving the bar. I remembered imbibing way too many drinks last night, then I remembered dancing to the band's music . . . but I couldn't remember how I'd gotten home. God, I really hoped I hadn't driven home. Kellan would be furious with me. I would be furious with me.

Thinking of Kellan sparked a vague memory of him singing to me, of the light twang of his guitar lulling me to sleep. I had no idea if that was a real memory, or if I'd dreamed it. It was peaceful, though, and I smiled as I rolled onto my back.

My stomach didn't like that-my head either.

I groaned and curled myself into a ball. I felt like I'd been brought back from the brink of death, and I silently swore to never drink again. I heard the sounds of someone else in the house and alarm shot through me. Who was here? I relaxed as I realized that Anna must have driven me home last night. There was no way she would have let me drive drunk.

Feeling disgusting, I made myself get out of bed. I just wanted to take a shower. I smelled like vomit. I stumbled a couple of steps as I yanked off my red Pete's shirt. Begging my stomach to stay at a tolerable level of nausea, I unbuttoned my jeans and pushed them down. I had to steady myself against the wall to kick them across the room, toward the general vicinity of the laundry basket. Seeing hard strands of dried gunk in my hair, I groaned again. So gross.

I could hear my sister clunking up the steps as I unfastened my bra. I flicked it toward the basket and prayed that she was bringing me a glass of water-I desperately needed one. I tried to shimmy out of my underwear and flick them into the laundry, but part of the fabric got stuck under my foot. Too tired and sick to be coordinated, I lost my balance and fell on my ass. Hard.

As I let out a loud curse, my bedroom door rapidly swung open.

"Anna!" I exclaimed. Surprised and embarrassed, I tried to cover myself with my hands. "You're just as bad about knocking as Griffin! I'm not dress-"

I stopped talking as I stared up at the person standing in my doorway. It was not my sister. It wasn't a girl at all. "Denny? What are you-"

Denny's face was bright red and he immediately averted his eyes from my naked body. I felt red-hot. Oh my God, I'm such an idiot. Definitely done with drinking. Memories flooded into my brain as Denny stammered an apology and closed my door. Anna hadn't come to my rescue last night, Denny had. Anna hadn't watched me get sick, Denny had. And Anna hadn't tucked me into bed and stayed all night, just to make sure I was okay. Denny, my spectacular ex-boyfriend turned best friend, had done all of that. And I'd just flashed him. Damn it.

My stomach and head paling in comparison to my pride, I scrambled to my feet and grabbed a towel lying on the dresser. I opened the bedroom door and found Denny on the other side of it. He was still red, still not looking at me, but holding a glass of water in my direction. "Sorry," he muttered. "You sounded like you needed help."

I took the glass, grateful and mortified at the same time. "Thank you." I inhaled the water, and Denny cautiously peeked over at me. He was still dressed in the clothes I vaguely remembered him wearing last night-nice slacks and a sharp dress shirt. There weren't a lot of wrinkles in the shirt, so he must have taken it off before climbing into the lumpy futon that was in our spare room.

I handed him the empty glass, wishing I had more. Denny read my mind. "I have to go to work, but I'll get you another one before I leave. How do you feel?"

I closed my eyes. "Really, really embarrassed." I cracked one eye open. "I'm so sorry you walked in on that."

A tiny smile lifted Denny's lips, and he turned his head away from me. "I meant your stomach."

The heat in my cheeks flamed a little hotter. Right. Duh. "Oh, um, much better . . . thank you."

Denny nodded and started heading back downstairs to get some more of the cool, clean water from the fridge. As he walked away, I told him, "Thank you for watching over me last night. I really . . . I really appreciate it."

Turning his head, Denny gave me his signature grin. "Anytime, mate. I'm sure you would have done the same for me."

I gave him an enthusiastic nod. "I'd do just about anything for you, Denny."

The smile on his face fell some, and I immediately knew exactly what he was thinking-anything but remain faithful to me. He didn't verbalize it, though. Instead, he nodded and turned away to finish taking care of me. Closing my eyes, I laid my head against the door. Someday I would stop feeling guilty for betraying him, right? No, probably not.

I brushed my teeth while Denny returned with more water. Even though I left the bathroom door ajar, he knocked on it. After drinking my second glass, I felt a lot better. Well, I felt like I could shower without slipping or heaving. As Denny turned to leave, I asked him, "How are you getting your car?"

He shrugged. "I called Abby. She should be here in a minute."

Nodding, I again told him, "Thank you, Denny."

He told me it was nothing and gave me a small wave before turning to head downstairs. I thought I heard a car honking "goodbye" while I luxuriated in the steaming warm shower. I wasn't sure what Kellan would think about Denny spending the night with me, but then I remembered that he already knew. The thought made me smile. It felt good to be honest with him, to not have any secrets for once. And as I remembered Kellan singing me to sleep, I felt even better. He hadn't flown into a rage and hopped the first flight back into town. He'd trusted me, even in my drunken state, to remain faithful to him. And I had.

I felt pretty proud of myself as I washed slime out of my hair. Not for overindulging on free shots-that wasn't one of my finer moments-but for not letting alcohol sweep me away into a remembered moment of passion with Denny. I felt like I'd been tested, and I'd passed.

Figuring I should check in with Anna, let her know I was alive and well and still coming to her appointment, I ransacked the bed for my cell phone. I found it buried in the covers; the battery was long dead. Kellan must have sung me to sleep until my phone disconnected. I couldn't remember when I'd dozed off, but I could easily picture Kellan keeping the line open while he listened to me sleeping. Maybe he'd fallen asleep that way, pretending that we were in bed together. God, I hope I hadn't snored.

When I plugged the phone in, there were several missed calls from Jenny, Kate, and Cheyenne. I let them all know I was fine, then texted Anna and let her know I was on my way.

It took twice as long as usual, but I eventually made it to my old apartment. Anna was bright-eyed and bushytailed when she got in the car. She was excited for the upcoming news-the sex of her baby. She was having an ultrasound today, and if my niece or nephew cooperated, we'd find out whether to decorate the nursery pink or blue. Of course, Anna had "known" it was a girl from the moment she'd accepted the pregnancy, and she'd already loaded up my old closet with dozens of outfits in pale pinks, light purples, and deep reds. It looked like Valentine's Day had thrown up in there. And that thought did not help my stomach.

Anna smirked when she noticed the color of my face. "Good night?" she asked, in an unaccommodatingly loud voice.

I cringed as I glared at her. "Not really." Well, that wasn't exactly true. I'd been having a great time until my liquid friends had decided to leave the party in the most uncomfortable way possible.

Anna laughed as I focused on the road. "I feel a little bad for petering out on you. That's so unlike me. Jenny get you home okay?"

Remembering the look on Jenny's face as I'd left the bar with Denny, I frowned and answered my sister without considering just who I was talking to. "No, she didn't take me home . . . Denny did."

"What? You went home with Denny?" she snapped.

I mentally smacked myself. I really hadn't planned on mentioning that to her. "I didn't 'go home' with him. . . . He dropped me off at the house, made sure I was okay." I stopped myself from telling her that he'd spent the night; I didn't want to send her into early labor.

When I glanced over at her, Anna narrowed her emerald eyes. Framed in hormonally lengthened thick eyelashes, her gaze was even more imposing than usual. "Yeah, I bet he made sure you were okay." Her eyebrow lifted in a clear accusation. "You sleep with him?"

My mouth fell open so far, I was sure my tonsils were visible. "Oh my God, Anna! No, I didn't . . . and thanks for your faith in me."

Pursing her lips, she snipped, "I have plenty of faith in you, Kiera. It's the massive amount of alcohol you consumed that I doubt. So, you really didn't bang him?"

Not answering her crass question, I studiously kept my eyes on the road. After a moment of silence, Anna finally said, "Okay, if you say so, I'll believe you." I could tell by her tone that she didn't completely believe me.

Relaxing my expression, I sighed in defeat. "I really didn't do anything with him, Anna. We're just friends now, I swear. And in case you're wondering, yes, I told Kellan. He called last night while Denny was taking care of me."

She considered my words for a moment, then said, "I thought Denny dropped you off?"

I glared at her out of the corner of my eye, and Anna chuckled. "Okay, Kiera. I believe you. If you say nothing happened, then nothing happened." Almost instantly she added, "Besides, you're a terrible liar anyway." I gave her my most wicked expression. She laughed again.

At the doctor's office, an ultrasound technician in faded yellow scrubs cheerfully walked us into a low-lit room. There was a faint antiseptic smell, and a computer nearby whirred and hummed, filling the silence. The woman instructed Anna to lie down on an examination table lined with paper. With a wonder-filled smile, Anna carefully reclined her plump body and adjusted her stretchy pants so that the bulk of her belly was exposed.

"Okay, let's get a look at my little girl," she merrily exclaimed.

"Oh," the technician said, "you already know the sex?" She squeezed some gel onto Anna's belly. As an afterthought, she told her, "This will be cold."

Anna sucked in a quick breath as the gel touched her skin. "No, this is my first ultrasound." She looked up at the woman spreading the gel around with a taser gun-I swear that's what it was-that was attached to the computer. "I just know I'm having girl, is all."

The woman smiled at her but didn't comment. I supposed she'd heard every wives' tale in the book from pregnant women claiming to know the sex.

When the image of Anna's belly appeared on the monitor, it was a blob of indistinguishable gray shapes. The technician seemed to know what she was looking at and pointed out several body parts to us. Anna and I looked at each other, then shrugged. Neither one of us was really seeing anything that resembled a human being. But then the spine came into view. It was distinct, defined . . . unmistakable. My eyes teared up as I saw something on the screen that I could relate to. Then a hand drifted into focus-a perfect, five-fingered hand. The fingers curled a little as the technician held the wand still.

"Oh my God, Kiera . . . look at that," Anna murmured, tears running down her cheeks. "My daughter waved at me."

I hugged my emotional sister, a little emotional myself now. After finishing up with the measurements and still shots, including one that was a perfect profile of the face, the technician frowned. "Hmmm."

Panic shot through my body. Was something wrong with the baby? Anna tried to sit up but couldn't around her stomach. The technician frowned more and moved the wand around to find whatever she'd been looking at. "Hold still, please."

"What is it? What's wrong?" Anna's voice had an edge of fear to it.

The technician relaxed her face, then smiled. "Oh, there's nothing wrong, it's just . . ." she trailed off, searching the screen again.

"Just what?" I asked, leaning in to see what she saw. I didn't see anything remarkable. The technician did, though.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. I'm sorry, but . . . you're having a boy."

Anna propped herself up on her elbows. "I'm what?"

The technician cringed. "I hope you haven't bought too many pink things."

"No, there must be some mistake. Check again. I'm having a girl." Anna scowled.

She did, then repeated, "Sorry . . . definitely a boy."

Tears started running down Anna's cheeks again, but for a completely different reason this time. "No, no, no . . . I'm having a girl." She snapped her head to mine. "I was supposed to have a girl!"

I rubbed her shoulder. "It's okay. You'll do great with a boy."

Anna nodded as she sank back to the table. "I know . . . I just really wanted . . ." She bit her lip to stop herself from saying it. I understood, though. Anna was a girly-girl, and she'd gotten her hopes up that she'd have a little princess to dress up. I doubt she even knew where to begin with a boy. But I knew she'd figure it out.

The technician handed Anna a tissue. "Sorry about that."

Anna dabbed her eyes but remained quiet. She remained mute until we got back into the car. Then that fiery hormonal temper that I knew and loved kicked in. Slamming her door shut, she snapped, "I'm going to kill that fucker when I see him tomorrow." I could only assume she meant Griffin.

Cringing at the harsh way Kellan's prized vehicle was being treated, I gingerly closed my door. "It will be all right, Anna. Little boys are fun." I really hadn't spent a lot of time around kids, male or female, so I wasn't sure if that was true. But that's what you're supposed to say, right?

Apparently not. Anna glared at me. She channeled all of her anger toward the technician, toward Griffin-hell, toward the universe-into her eyes. I was sure my internal organs were starting to boil as she stared at me.

"I don't know the first thing about raising a little boy. And look who's going to be his role model." She directed her stare out the window, choosing to melt the glass instead of my poor brain. "He'll be a self-righteous, womanizing Neanderthal, just like his father."

"I thought that's what you liked about Griffin?" I murmured that, but Anna heard me and redirected her ire back to me. I wisely said nothing further and started the car. Whatever Anna and Griffin had together, it was best to leave it between them.

When we got back to the house, Anna's irritation had dissipated some, and melancholy started to replace it; she even shed a few silent tears. She'd really had her heart set on a girl. Wondering if she would bite me, metaphorically or perhaps literally at this point, I put my hand on her shoulder. "You will love your baby boy just as much as you would have loved your baby girl. And don't worry about Griffin. You know that Kellan, Matt, and Evan won't let him corrupt his child . . . too much."

Anna gave me a blank stare for a moment then her face broke into a tiny smile. And even though her cheeks were splotchy, her nose was running, and her eyes were red, she was still drop-dead gorgeous.

I stayed with Anna for a while after that, making sure she was okay and helping her pack. Even though Anna was only going to be in Los Angeles for the weekend, she packed more stuff than I did. As I wrestled her bag closed, she told me that she wanted to be prepared for anything. I couldn't help but glance at her stomach after she said that. If my sister had been a little more "prepared for anything," she wouldn't be in the situation she was in now-about to bring a mini-Griffin into the world.

A surprise was waiting for me when I got home. Jenny's car was in the driveway, and she was standing beside the open driver's side door, waving at me. When I parked beside her, Rachel, Kate, and Cheyenne popped out of the other doors. I grinned ear to ear at seeing my girlfriends.

"What are you guys doing here?"

Jenny hopped over to me, a spring in her step. "We're here to help you celebrate your last night in Seattle."

I grabbed my head as the perky blonde wrapped her arms around me. "I think I celebrated enough yesterday," I murmured.

Cheyenne ducked back into Jenny's car. "Well, we'll have a much more subdued party." She reemerged from the car with an overnight bag. "We thought we'd all sleep over."

Shrugging, I grinned and indicated the house. "Sounds great."

Jenny, Rachel, and Kate grabbed their bags while I unlocked the front door. As I was trying to wrestle the key out of the lock that was starting to stick on me at times, Jenny came up to me and put a hand on my shoulder. "Hey, was everything . . . all right . . . last night?"

I could tell by the angle of her brow that what she really meant was, Did anything happen with you and Denny? She was nice enough to not say it directly to me, but she was wondering the same thing my sister had-if I'd cheated on Kellan. I shook my head at her, trying not to be irritated. It was my own fault, really.

"Nothing happened . . . except Denny watched me throw up in the toilet all night long."

Jenny cringed. "Ugh, sorry we got you wasted. That wasn't intentional."

I smirked at her. "You don't have to apologize for my bad judgment." I frowned as I remembered why I'd been so quick to drown the evening in alcohol. "Leaving Seattle is much harder than I ever thought it would be." My voice fell to a whisper and my vision hazed with unshed tears. God, was I losing it already?

Jenny hugged me. "Don't you dare start crying on me now! If you start, then I'll start, and we'll both be a blubbering mess all night long."

I laughed as I held her tight. Before long, the rest of my girlfriends enclosed us in a group hug. The moroseness of the moment made me chuckle. "Okay, enough of that," I told them, breaking apart from the circle. "Tonight is about having fun, not wallowing." I looked over each of them as I added, "And I'll be back. Seattle is as much of a home to me as Athens."

Kate ran her fingers under her eyes, then her face brightened. "I've got candy and popcorn."

Cheyenne looped her arm around Kate's. "And I've got every chick flick under the sun."

It wasn't too much later that we had a full-fledged slumber party going. I hadn't had a sleepover since the eighth grade, but childhood memories instantly assaulted me as the girls spread out their treasures. There were enough movies to last a week solid, enough candy to feed a small country, and enough beauty products to keep my sister stocked for a month. It gave me a serious case of the giggles to give myself a facial in my living room with four other girls. And it was so much fun I didn't care how ridiculous we all looked.

Halfway through the second movie, my doorbell rang. Even though I was in my pajamas with a green facemask on, I hurried to answer it. Dressed in a tank top and Kellan's black boxers, I pulled the door wide open. Hopefully it was our pizza. And hopefully the delivery girl noticed that I was wearing Kellan's underwear . . . since she'd seen them when Kellan had ordered food during our strip poker night.

My amused laughter died on my lips as I stared at the person standing in my doorway. It wasn't the pizza girl. Joey stood in my doorway. She ran her eyes over me and let out a derisive snort. I felt my cheeks heat, even under the layer of the cooling green tea mask slathered over my skin.

"What are you doing here? Kellan told you to never come back," I snapped, my good mood gone.

Joey ignored my attitude and tilted her head to look past me into the house. "Kellan here?"

I sidestepped to block her vision. "No, he's in L.A."

She grabbed a long lock of her black hair and twirled it around her finger as she absorbed my answer. Her fingernails were long, sharp, and painted bright red. Remembering the long scratch along Kellan's jaw, I ground my teeth together and considered slamming the door in her face.

She looked unaffected by my unhappiness. "Is he seriously recording an album? Or is that just some line he uses to pick up girls?" She smirked as her dark eyes drifted to the ring on my finger.

Even though I knew it shouldn't bother me, it really got under my skin that this woman was belittling our relationship. Kellan and I had gone through so much together. For her to demean it and dismiss it as some casual hookup boiled my blood. "Yes, he's recording an album." I started to close the door. "I'll tell him you stopped by."

She stuck her toes in the door's path. "Interesting. So . . . he's gonna be hot shit soon? Well, hotter than he already is, at any rate."

As she stood in my doorway chewing on her lip, an expression seeped into her features that reminded me of Ebenezer Scrooge in A Christmas Carol. I could clearly see the woman's mental image of herself counting large stacks of money, money she'd earned at someone else's expense.

I could feel my friends cautiously approaching the door as I sighed, "You have other copies of the tape, don't you?"

Joey removed her foot as she shrugged. "I was just returning his copy. I have plenty of others." As Jenny stepped to my side, her face equally covered in green goo, Joey sprightly asked, "You guys want to watch it? It's pretty freaking hot. Kellan did this thing where he-"

I put up my hand to stop her explanation. God, no, I didn't ever want to watch him having sex with someone else. And I definitely didn't want a play-by-play. "I don't want anything to do with you or your tape. Kellan paid you, and we're done as far as I'm concerned."

I heard some of the girls behind me gasp as they realized just what was going on. Jenny was the only one of them I'd told about the sex tape; she apparently hadn't passed on the information. Jenny was awesome that way.

Joey shrugged as she adjusted her short skirt. "Whatever, I was just offering you an advance screening to the movie of the year."

She spun on her heel to leave. Outraged, embarrassed, and mortified for Kellan, I stepped forward and blurted, "Are you really going to sell that? I mean, you're on it too. Do you really want a bunch of skeezy guys entertaining themselves with your private life?"

Joey stopped on the sidewalk and turned her dark head to glare at me. "If it means I'm set for life, then yes." Raising one edge of her lip, she added, "Besides, I'll be forever linked to a rich and famous rock star. I'll be famous, and what could be better than that?"

I shook my head, not understanding the desire to be famous, regardless of the price. Here I was, trying to find a way to stay out of Kellan's spotlight, while Joey was perfectly fine with selling her skin to find a way into it. How sadly desperate she must be to crave attention so much she'd do just about anything to get it. Oddly enough, my anger faded as I stared at her in stunned silence. While Joey waited for some response from me, all I felt for her was pity.

Retreating to the warmth of my home with Kellan, I told her, "I hope you find what you're looking for, Joey." Not expecting me to react that way, her brow was deeply pointed in confusion as I shut the door on her.