Kindred (The Kindred #1)

Kindred (The Kindred #1) Page 21

There was something out there that wanted her with a ferocious hunger. Something that wanted to take her away from him, and he could not have that. That knowledge spurred him into action; he couldn’t be separated from her for a moment longer. Not pausing to think about it, he reached out and rapped lightly on the window.

His breath caught when she appeared before him, a beautiful angel silhouetted against the dark night. Her golden hair tumbled around her shoulders in thick waves that framed her exquisite face. The long blue t-shirt she wore fell to mid thigh, baring her creamy skin. His baser instincts leapt to life, his mouth watered as his hands clenched the tree branch. This was quite possibly the biggest mistake he had ever made, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. Not when he got to look at her like this.

Her stunning eyes widened when she caught sight of him, her rosebud mouth parted slightly as she stared in astonished silence. Then, she was moving swiftly, unlocking the window, sliding it up as she leaned toward him. Her sweet scent of strawberries and spices assailed him, the beat of her heart pounded in his ears, instantly arousing the hunger that was ever present whenever she was near.

“Devon,” she breathed, her husky voice causing a small shiver to run down his spine.

Her eyes raked over him, the desire radiating from her caused his own to intensify tenfold. He had felt her want for him before, but it was stronger tonight, deeper and more urgent. He didn’t know where it had come from, what had caused it, but he wasn’t sure he could resist it. His hand tightened around the branch, he had to stop himself from tearing it from the tree as he fought the fierce urge to seize hold of her and ease the burning hunger raging through him.

This had been a mistake; he never should have come here, not as tumultuous and unsettled as he was. He could hurt her; he would hurt her if he lost control. Though he knew that he should go, he did not move. He couldn’t leave her.

She took a small step back, turning slightly to allow him access to her room. He hesitated, knowing that if he went through that window there would be no turning back. If he entered that room, he knew he would never be able to separate from her again. And he did not care. He did not care about anything but holding her, feeling her, being with her.

Hunger and need burned through him, but he could control it. He would control it. He could deny himself anything to be near her, to be with her, to keep her safe.

He moved swiftly through the window, rising slowly to his full height before her. She gazed up at him with wide eyes that gleamed in the glow of the television. The light played over her perfect features, robbing him of all reason as he simply gazed at her, unable to move. He sensed a strange vulnerability about her tonight, a wealth of sadness and fear that he had never seen before. He did not know what had happened with Luther, but it was obvious that it had troubled her greatly.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, slightly breathless.

He didn’t know what he was doing here; he just knew that this was where he was supposed to be. Where he was always supposed to be. “I had to see you,” he said honestly.

Her eyes widened even more, tears filled their bright depths. Those tears broke his paralysis. Reaching out, he wrapped his hand gently around the back of her head. The feel of her instantly soothed the raging beast, instantly calmed the fierce urges clamoring loudly inside him. He pulled her against him, relief filling him as her body melded against his, fitting perfectly, completing him.

Though no air came out, he breathed a sigh of relief, his fingers stroked through her silken hair as he caressed the back of her head. He had to remember to be careful around her, remember to pretend to breathe, and to keep her away from his nonexistent heartbeat. He had to remember to be gentle, to keep his strength restrained so as not to hurt her. But he found it difficult to concentrate on such things whenever he was around her.

“Cassie,” he murmured, dropping his head into her hair, nuzzling her softly.

A fiery ache for her spread through his whole body. His grip on her tightened, his body hardened as he held her. Her arms wrapped around him, clinging to him as her fingers dug into his back. He did not know how long he held her, simply taking pleasure in the feel of her. The rightness of her body against his robbed him of all sense and reason. Time had no meaning in heaven, and he knew that this was as close to heaven as he was ever going to get. This was the only bit of heaven he would ever know in his world of death and destruction.

The flow of light from the moon drew his attention to the fact that it was getting late. He did not want to leave her, but he could not keep her up all night. She needed her rest, needed her sleep. She was far more fragile than he. She was a breakable, mortal human. The thought seized hold of him, sending a fierce bolt of bloodlust surging through him.

His fangs sprang free. Shaking, unnerved, he struggled to keep hold of himself. He fought fiercely to keep the demon inside, though it was bursting to get free of its cage. It was bursting to sink its teeth into her, bursting to drain the sweet, pure blood that pounded deliciously through her veins. It clamored to deplete her, and change her, and make her his forever. It clamored to make her immortal, and strong, and safe from the world of imminent death she resided in.

A tremor wracked through him, his grip tightened upon her. “Devon,” she said softly.

He realized that his hold upon her had become painful. She did not strain against him though, did not complain. He fought to regain control, fought not to think about the appealing blood he could hear pumping through her veins. He knew she would be wonderful, a powerful rush unlike any he’d ever known. Then he would turn her, make her his forever, and keep her safe from the ultimate finality of her fragile life.

The temptation was so fierce, so overwhelming that he dropped his head to the side of her neck. He caught the scent of her blood, fierce and strong. The enchanting smell assailed him, causing uproar inside of him. The bloodlust shook him, the beast screamed to be soothed by her, appeased by her. His lips pulled back. His teeth were painful with their need to be sated, throbbing with their desire to pierce her. They were heavy and sharp and aching to bite down, aching to sink deep into her tender flesh and feast upon her.

“Devon?”

A tremor tore through him again, shaking him. He could not be denied, he would not be denied. And then she caressed him. Her delicate fingers stroked over his back, soothing the beast inside of him. He shuddered, burying his head in the side of her neck as he struggled fiercely to regain control of himself. Reason began to return as her gentle touch lulled him, slowly returning the monster to its cage.

What had he been thinking? He had been about to condemn her to his world. A world of darkness and brutality. He had been about to take the light from her. Had been about to rob her of her purity and goodness, of her innocence, and he had been about to do it against her will. He had to get away from her, stay away from her. She rocked his self restraint, his control, and in his world those were two things that he desperately needed to keep under wraps, or he would kill someone.

Shuddering, he caressed her hair once more. He would watch over her until the threat was gone, but he could not be near her anymore, could not hold her again. The thought tore through him with a burning rage that seared the inside of him, and left ashes in its wake. Agony blazed hotly in him, he felt the loss acutely, even though he still held her against him.

She tilted her head up, her bright eyes gleaming in the light. Her beautiful face broke his heart, shaking him completely, leaving him rattled and lost to her forever. In that moment he knew he could leave her, that he could go to the opposite side of the world, but she would be with him for eternity. She would remain burned into his heart, his thoughts, and every fiber of his being. He would never be without her, never be free of her; never escape her.

And he didn’t want to be. Even if he could not be beside her, he wanted to carry her with him everywhere he went, no matter how far.

“I should go.” His voice was tight, but he had regained most of his control.

She simply stared at him, the longing in her eyes almost more than he could stand. “Don’t.”

He blinked in surprise, not sure what to say, or do. Her long lashes lowered over her eyes, heat flared through her creamy cheeks. A soft groan issued from him. Her eyes came back to his, hesitant and shy. Her sweet simplicity was heart wrenching. She was far too good for him, and everything that he was. He was a monster and a killer, and she was an angel.

When he did not speak, her face flushed even redder, fire climbed high into her cheekbones. “I uh… I didn’t mean…”

Her voice trailed off, she ducked her face, hiding it from him. Brushing back her silken hair, he cupped her face gently, feeling the heat of her skin against his palms. Her eyes flitted up to his. “I know,” he said gently, hoping to ease some of her embarrassment. “I know what you meant.”

He traced his thumb gently over her lip, relishing in the soft fullness of it. He could stay with her, lie beside her, and keep her safe as he held her through the night. He could control himself for that. He could give himself this, and then he would leave tomorrow. Even as he thought it, he knew he lied.

He was not leaving her. It would never happen. His feelings for her were to strong, to powerful, and he was acutely aware of the fact that he knew what that meant. That he knew what she was to him now, what she would always be, and how this would all end. He just did not want to think about it. Not now, because the ending was something that he didn’t want for her. The ending was something that she would not want for herself, and he hated the fact that he may end up forcing his life upon her.

Now, he simply needed to hold her and protect her and keep her safe. Even if he may end up being the most dangerous thing to her.

He would just have to learn to control himself around her, and he would have to make sure that he was well sated whenever she was near. But he could not leave her; he did not think he could survive if he was unable to touch her, to know that she was safe, and that she was with him. To lose her would destroy him. On some primitive level, he knew that he could not survive without her.

“Beautiful,” he whispered. Her lashes swept the delicate curve of her cheek as she ducked her face once more. He gently nudged her chin up again. When her eyes met his, he bent slowly, wanting to give her time to deny him. Wanting to give her time to come to her senses and flee while she still could.

She didn’t move, didn’t even breathe as he bent slowly over her. His lips brushed over hers in a butterfly caress that nearly shattered him as the glorious feel of her suffused him. The touch of her lips healed every broken bit of him. It soothed the loneliness of his life, made him forget the hunger and ruin of his existence. Though she did not make right the many deaths that stained his soul, she greatly eased the pain that resided permanently inside him.

He deepened the kiss, needing more of her. Light and warmth suffused him. Whiteness embraced his essence, pushing out the black as his hands tightened in her hair. He was trying to go slow, trying not to scare her, but he wanted more. He wanted all of her.

The fiery hunger tore through him once more. Pulling away, he struggled to regain control as he met her wide, stunned eyes. Slowly, she lifted her fingers to her mouth, gently touching them to her lips in awe. “Are you ok?” he asked worriedly, frightened that he had gone to fast and scared her.

She smiled tremulously. “Yes.”

He clutched her tightly to him again, needing her warmth and strength as he struggled to maintain restraint. “It’s late, you should lie down,” he ground out. She gave a small nod, but did not look at him again. “Come on.”

He led her slowly over to the bed. The blankets were pulled back from where she had laid before he arrived. He stared at the bed, wanting nothing more than to crawl in beside her and hold her tight. She sat down, her head bent, her golden hair tumbling forward in luxurious waves.

Sliding her legs onto the bed, the t-shirt she wore pulled back slightly to reveal a mouth watering view of her creamy thigh. Devon tightened everywhere, stiffening as more than just bloodlust tore through him. Then she looked at him again, her face bright red, her innocence almost intolerable.

Lifting her hand to him, she moved over. “Lie with me for a little bit.”

For a moment he could almost feel his heart trip hammering, almost feel it turning over in his chest with a fierce slam that shook the place where it had once beat. She was testing the very limits of his control, nearly destroying the small thread he still had upon his self restraint. Then her gaze darted to the window, and he saw the fear that crossed her face, flashed swiftly through her eyes as she gazed at the dark night.

He turned slowly, searching for any hint of danger with his far superior eyes, and with every ounce of his vast power. Though he knew that the monster was still out there, he could not sense it now. It was either far away, or it was strong enough to mask itself at a distance. His stomach turned slightly. Though he was more powerful than most vampires in existence, Cassie was not. The thought of something that strong out there pursuing her, made the decision for him. If he stayed with her tonight, he would know that she was safe, protected.