If You Stay (Beautifully Broken #1)

If You Stay (Beautifully Broken #1) Page 23

Pax

I am falling, falling, falling.

It is black and dark and I can't see, I can't think, I can't feel. But that's how I like it. If I can't feel, then nothing hurts. So I keep it that way.

If I wake, I drink myself back to sleep with a Xanax chaser. It isn't long before I'm in the black again, drifting pointlessly along, sleeping without nightmares.

Only blackness.

I sigh. This is where I belong, where the dark is timeless.

Painless.

The light is painful. The light is where I see her face and know how I failed her.

I'll stay far away from the light.

Forever.

It isn't worth it.

I start to close my eyes but realize that they are already closed, so I smile.

This is where I belong.