Ashes (The Kindred #2)

Ashes (The Kindred #2) Page 32

Moving slowly over to her, he clasped hold of her cold, rigid arm. She had been so accepting of him. She had never turned against him, even when the others, including Cassie, had been weary of what he was. There had been so much life and love inside of her. He had seen many dead bodies in his long life, but this was the first one that truly upset him. Not only because it had caused Cassie so much pain, but also because he had truly liked the woman too.

“I’ll take care of her,” he promised, knowing that it would be the only thing Lily would care about.

Lifting the sheet, he dropped it gently back over her. His soul was beaten, he was weary and aching and so very hurt. There was a tight knot of pain in his chest, an aching loss that he wasn’t sure he could survive. He had lost the only thing that mattered to him, the only person he had ever truly loved.

Yet, he couldn’t acknowledge that loss, not now. There was too much he had to deal with. The first of which was what he had seen in Cassie’s eyes just moments ago. There had been something about her that he had been trying to puzzle out for the past few weeks. Something about her abilities, or lack thereof, that had been nagging at him. There were so many things that didn’t make sense; he just hadn’t known who to turn to in order to help him figure it out.

Now, he did.

Turning from the morgue, Devon made his way slowly outside. The sun’s rays did little to warm him as he made his way toward his car. Hitting the alarm button, he threw the driver’s side door open and slid inside. He drove slowly through the winding back streets, trying to puzzle out everything that had just happened. The flash of red he had seen in Cassie’s eyes haunted him as he made his way toward Luther’s house.

The hazy fog of anger that enshrouded Cassie was a welcome relief to the agony that kept threatening to rise up and consume her. She could not escape the image of her grandmother’s face, so cold and almost unrecognizable. Where was her smile, the light in her eyes, where was the welcoming, loving hug that she gave so easily?

Gone. Forever.

Neither could she forget the haunted, pained, hurt look that had filled Devon’s eyes when she had turned against him. She wavered briefly in her determination, and then her anger snapped welcomingly back into place. There was no room for regret in this new world of hers, no room for wavering. There was only room for revenge, and she wanted that more than anything else right now.

Including Devon.

“Cassie…”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” She cut Chris off sharply, wanting no sympathy, no condolences right now. She didn’t want love anymore. It only left her vulnerable, open to hurt and pain. It was something that she had known before Devon arrived, something that she had lived by. But he had made her forget about it, for a little while anyway. Today she had been forcefully reminded of it. Today she had been slapped in the face with it.

Devon had made her love, and hope, and dream again. They were all things that she knew would get her hurt, but she had been unable to stop herself from doing them in his presence. He had opened her up, made her vulnerable, and she hated him for that. She hated him for making her forget about the pain and death that encompassed her life. If he hadn’t arrived, then none of this would have happened. Julian wouldn’t be here without Devon, and Cassie would have been better prepared for the loss of her loved ones. The loss of her grandmother still would have hurt, but it would not have devastated her to this degree. It would not have shattered her in this way.

But Devon had come, and he had opened her up, and now she was an empty shell of the person he had made her. All that existed in this body was anger. There was no room for hope and love in here. Not when revenge was consuming her. Fisting her hands, Cassie stared unseeingly out the window. She would get Julian. She would destroy him. And she did not care if she died in the process; she almost hoped that she did. She wanted all of this to end.

She didn’t want to live like this anymore.

She just had to make sure that she took that monster with her when she went. Chris turned into her driveway, parking beside Luther’s car. Cassie stared silently at the small Cape house. It had always seemed so welcoming and inviting before. It had always been her home. Now it seemed foreign, alien; cold. How could it be a home when the person who had made it such was gone? It couldn’t, that was the simple and only answer.

It was no longer her home, but that didn’t matter as she didn’t plan on living here for much longer. Chris turned toward her, his eyes weary and wounded. She didn’t meet his gaze, she simply couldn’t. He had always been more like a brother than just her friend, and she didn’t want to love him. Not anymore. If something happened to him too…

Cassie shut the thought down. If something happened to him, she would deal with it. She would survive it. It would not destroy her.

Although, it would. No matter how much she told herself that it wouldn’t, Chris’s death would still level her. Cassie shuddered, the anger flitting momentarily away as sorrow rose swiftly up, nearly choking her. What had she done? What was she becoming?

Her head bowed, her shoulders heaved. Chris reached out to touch her but she jerked away from him, knowing that his touch would unravel her completely. She could not unravel, not here, not now. There was someone that needed to die first.

Chris’s hand hung briefly in the air before falling limply back to his side. Forging her walls of anger once more, Cassie shoved the door to his beat up Mustang open. Climbing swiftly from the car, she marched up the walkway, climbed the stairs, and thrust the door open. The house was just as cold inside as it had looked outside. Melissa, Dani, and Luther were in the living room, their heads shot up as she stormed into the foyer. Chris trudged slowly in behind her.

Dani and Melissa were huddled upon the couch, tears marred both their faces, and their eyes were bloodshot. Luther was in his customary spot at the fireplace mantel, his arm resting on top of it. Though he was not currently crying his eyes were bloodshot and swollen as well. Melissa hurried toward her; her normally neat hair in disarray. Her onyx eyes shimmered with tears, sorrow radiated from her. Holding out her hands, Melissa reached for her, but Cassie took a swift step back. Fury filled her.

“Don’t,” she ordered briskly.

Melissa’s hands fell to her sides, confusion marred her pretty features. Luther and Dani had also started to come forward, but they both stopped only feet behind Melissa. “Cassie…”

“Did you see this coming?” Cassie demanded her voice almost unrecognizable due to the anger that filled it.

Melissa’s dark eyebrows shot up in surprise, her mouth parted slightly. She glanced briefly at Chris, who still hung back, looking more like a kicked puppy then the man that Cassie knew so well. He gave an almost imperceptible shake of his head that caused the fire inside of Cassie to rise up a level. “Did you?” Cassie fairly barked.

“No!” Melissa gasped. “No Cassie of course not, if I had I would have stopped it…”

“You couldn’t have stopped it, we couldn’t have stopped it. There was no stopping it. There is no stopping any of it.”

The four of them stared at her in disbelief; Chris shifted uncomfortably, his head bowed low. “We could have helped, somehow,” Melissa whispered.

“There is no help.”

Cassie turned away from them, resting her hand on the banister as she made her way upstairs. She needed to take inventory of her weapons, make sure that she was well supplied. She would need them for when she went hunting later.

“Cassie, where is Devon?”

She turned back at Luther’s question, noting the worry and fear that radiated from his wide grey eyes. “No longer welcome in this house.”

The only thing that broke the profound silence was the chiming of her grandmother’s cherished grandfather clock. Cassie shuddered as she reached the top of the stairs, she ignored the eyes she could feel boring into her back.

CHAPTER 22

Devon slid down in his seat, his eyes fixed on the house across the street. He should have known that Luther and Melissa would not be here. Of course they would be with Cassie. But that was ok; he was willing to wait for as long as it took. He just hoped that Melissa did not come back with Luther. This was not something that he wished to discuss in front of her.

Sliding lower in his seat, Devon tried to keep his mind off of Cassie, and the agony that continued to twist in his gut. He didn’t think he could stand to lose her, but he had. And though he felt empty and hollow, he couldn’t help but wonder if it was for the best. There was the obvious danger and threat that Julian and Isla represented, but he was also a danger to her. He could control himself around her, for now, but he didn’t know for how much longer. It was a fact he had realized a few weeks ago, when he had realized exactly what she was to him. Either they end it, or eventually she would have to join him. Though neither option had appealed to her, he had known that in the end she would choose life, a family, and humanity over darkness and death.

Over him.

And who could blame her? Certainly not him. But he hadn’t been ready to lose her just yet, he had wanted, needed more time with her. More time might have made it easier to release her. But even as he thought it, he knew he lied. It never would have been easy to release her, and more time together would have made it even worse. She meant far too much to him for him ever to be able to release her easily.

If he could have released her at all.

He tried to shut the thought down. He tried to blame it on the demon inside him, but he knew that the man was thinking the same thing. Neither man nor beast could have let her go without a fight. He still wasn’t sure that he could.

When all of this was over, he knew that he would have to get as far away from her as possible if he was going to avoid changing her by force. Something he knew she would never forgive him for, but he wasn’t so certain that he even cared about that anymore. Not if it meant being able to keep her with him forever.

Shifting uncomfortably, Devon’s hands tightened on the wheel as sorrow swelled within him. He had to get his mind off of his thoughts; he would go crazy if he didn’t. He may very well snap if he continued to sit here and obsess over his misery. He could still take her, he could make her stay with him, and the monster inside of him was very tempted by the notion. The man knew that it would be the worst thing he could ever do to her. She would hate him, she would never forgive him. He would lose her forever.

You could keep control of her mind, a little voice inside him whispered. Keep her as yours, make her love you again.

Devon shuddered, excited and disgusted by the thought. Yes, he could do that, but it wouldn’t be his Cassie, and though he could make her love him again it would never be the same. It would never be the love that she had so easily and trustingly given to him before. It would be a forced love and it would be fake. He would rather live without her than force that upon her.

A Toyota Camry rolled slowly by. Devon’s breath froze as Luther swung into his driveway, parking the car. Devon’s eyes narrowed as he searched the shadowed interior, relieved to discover that Melissa was not present. Luther sat in the car for a few moments, his hands gripped tight to the wheel, his head bowed in grief. Devon wanted to wait for him to emerge, but he was restless, and he had waited long enough.

Thrusting the door open, Devon made his way swiftly across the street at an easy, loping run. Luther’s head shot up in surprise, his eyes widened when Devon tapped on the driver’s side window. Quickly rolling down the window he stared at Devon through bloodshot, slightly swollen eyes. The bright grey of them was highlighted by the glasses perched precariously on the tip of his nose. It was apparent that he had been crying, but his eyes were dry now.

“Devon,” he said softly.

“I need to talk to you.”

Luther sighed heavily, dropping his head slightly. “I can’t change her mind Devon, I wish I could, but I can’t. God how I wish I could,” he muttered, his gaze drifting to his closed garage doors. From what Cassie had told him that was often where they held their training practices. The garage was full of a wide array of exercise equipment, and weapons.

Devon swallowed heavily, his muscles constricting briefly in his chest. “I’m not here for that. Changing her mind won’t happen.” Devon didn’t add that he truly wanted to believe that it was for the best anyway, not when his soul felt like it was being crushed.

It took a moment for his words to sink in; Luther’s gaze came slowly back to him, his eyebrows drawn questioningly together. “I don’t understand. Why are you here then?”

“There are some things that have been bothering me, about Cassie. Even before all this happened. I would like to discuss them with you.”

Luther’s eyes darkened, worry creased his brow. Devon felt momentarily guilty about adding more to the man’s troubles, but he was the only one that might have answers for him. “Um, yes, yes of course.”